I lay awake as the colors of my room fade away into black and white. The red numbers of my alarm clock shine in solitude. They remind me that I have two days left.
I stare at the cold wall next to my pillow.
I'm not ready, Lord. Infectious smiles and giggles have found a way into my heart. It will be strange not seeing their faces everyday. They wait all day to share their stories with me. Who is going to intently listen?
A tear slips down my cheek.
You've called me to another place. I'm willing to go, but it's not easy. When they quietly mention not knowing what they're going to do next year...my heart breaks. If it were up to me I'd agree to another year in an instant.
Rain falls outside my open window.
You carefully remind me that there is another family needs a Full-time Nanny. It's not the first time You have brought this to my attention. It's a hard thing to explain.
I pray that I have planted the right seeds, and shown Your amazing love. I've tried my best to teach lessons and ended up learning a few myself. It's been a good run. Show me where you need me to go. May the right doors be opened, and others be locked tight. You hold the keys to this life.
Broken and Burdened,